Strange Days

Ok, so I have recently been feeling a little under the weather, more anxious than usual, and just a little off. Then, all of a sudden a couple days ago, I was just walking down the hall and all of a sudden I knew if I didn't get to the bathroom quick, I was going to get sick...I'm talkin super-nauseous. Now, the last time I felt like this, and had all the other little things going on too...well...surprise...it's a baby! So, you know that's what I was thinking again. Here I am, mad at myself, mad at J-train for doing this to me AGAIN, mad at EVERYTHING and then a little excited, and A LOT scared because we didn't plan to do this so fast again, our wonderful son is 14 months! Then J-train reminded me that when we found out we were pregnant, just 6 months after we got married (we wanted to wait a couple of years) I was nervous (to say the least) then, and now we have the most amazing, precious, joyous, light of my life little boy who I want to spend every second of every day with and can't imagine my life without. Well...3 pregnancy tests later (2 from the Dollar Store and 1 from Walmart just in case the dollar store ones really are only worth a dollar...and because I have a little OCD) they all said negative. WHAT???? Well, I know they are wrong and I must just not have enough hormones yet to show up!! So, I, of course, am thinking for sure I am prego and just get ready because I didn't lose that 75 pounds I wanted to lose before my next one, and I wanted to try to go raw, and to get my hair colored again, and grow my hair out (yeah right, I hate the in-between stages) and just get things together. Most of all, I just want little j to feel like he's got ALL my attention and has an amazing childhood before we bring another one into the picture. NOW I'm taking care of J-train this afternoon because he came home from work and said he's felt nauseous all day and just not feeling good. MAYBE HE'S PREGO TOO!!!!!! or maybe I'm just a little jacked up and we both got a stomach bug. Hum...we'll see in a couple weeks!!